Minutes to Memories

So I drop by the office this afternoon because… well, how do I put this nicely… well, I had to pee.

TMI I know, but anyhow…

First thing I notice is smoke billowing across the parking lot. With great reverence to the biological wonders of God, my personal needs were suddenly less important because, in case you haven’t heard, where there’s smoke there’s FIRE!

It didn’t take me long to discover a brush fire in the backyard of one of our business neighbors, but this was odd on two accounts:
(1) they are out of business and the building is vacant, and…
(2) no one was there.

I did a little wandering around following my discovery because wandering around is what you do in situations like this, and then I decide to call the realtor who has the place listed because I’m guessing she would be more concerned about this than anyone. She was. She thanked me and said she would call the fire department.

That’s good, I think. I didn’t want to be involved in case the neighbors are burning some brush and get mad at me.

So I go back to wandering around again, and I run into another neighbor. We talk, and I learn that the owners “had” been there that morning working on the building, so I’m starting to feel guilty right away. So I decide to go to the bathroom.

But, no.

I notice a lady walking up to the property, and my first thought is, “Oh, crap (sorry for the foul language), now I’m caught.” So, like the sad puppy I am, I go over to talk to her and admit my moral failings, but I get the distinct impression that this was not the owner, but the realtor (for one, she was a different race, and for two, she seemed to be wandering around like me).

Turns out it wasn’t the realtor, but someone who had just dropped by to check out the property for sale. Anyhoo, she enlisted me in an attempt to put out the fire.

So now I’m getting deeper in this.

Well, we start to fill up an abandoned cooler with water from a water hose when the real fire truck shows up. I happen to know one of the firemen, which was cool, but anyway, they put out the fire quickly. Most excitement they’ve had all day (and me, too).

So one of the other firemen comes up with a notebook and wants my name, address, and telephone number.

So I’m getting ratted out on this deal anyway!

Oh well, at least the story ends well. After all the water putting out the fire, I finally got the chance to go in and use the bathroom.

What is the moral of this story? Well, if you have to pee, and there's a fire in the backyard of an abandoned neighbor's business, and if you don't want to give your contact information to the fire department, well, instead of wandering around, just go extinguish the fire naturally.